There are few things that repulse me more than self-discipline. I’ve never practiced a musical instrument, consistently made my bed in the morning or paid my bills at a regular interval.
As a Church Planter, I am well aware of the fact that my own day-to-day life sets and example for what it means to follow Jesus. There is more to following Jesus than making the right decision when the time comes. It’s means becoming the kind of person who is in the routine of making the right decision.
So my lack of self-discipline is a problem. Nowhere was I feeling this more acutely than in my lack of spiritual discipline.
One key to becoming a person of discipline is laid out in Charles Duhigg’s The Power of Habit. According to Duhigg, some habits are better than others, because they enable other habits to form. For instance, it’s easier to quit smoking if you are taking up running because you’re building on one healthy habit. Duhigg calls these “Keystone Habits.” As a freelance content and social media marketer, I have no outside enforced schedule. Most mornings, I would wake up grab my computer and start checking emails in bed.
I wanted to be the kind of person that dedicated time daily to prayer and scripture meditation. But most days I’d just get busy and it wasn’t happening.
I had to admit something embarrassing: I needed something more tangible than a vague desire to be godlier actually to become a person of spiritual discipline.
So I enrolled in a local Crossfit gym. My thought was that the regularly scheduled classes and the social pressure would actually inspire me to get out of bed and do something with my day.
Once out of bed, then I’d worry about “being spiritual.”
Here are five lessons I’ve learned six weeks into this experiment.
1. You can’t just roll out of bed
The first time I went to class, I rolled out of bed, grabbed some leftover cold pizza and drove to the gym.
Two-thirds of the way through, I excused myself to throw up in the alley.
Before the next session, I woke up an hour early, which gave me the opportunity to drink a cup of coffee, practice Lectio and eat a handful of almonds. This was good, because it is closer to my actual goal.
The thought that I would be able to roll out of bed and complete a grueling workout was naive to say the least. Developing discipline will require some R & D, the right gear, and a few opportunities to fail.
2. Plan ahead
A few mornings, I was late because of the time I spent frantically looking for my workout shoes. More than a few days, I ended up commando because I forgot to put my boxers in my gym bag.
Pulling off the now two hour commitment of coffee-Lectio-commute-workout requires some planning ahead. This is the beauty of a keystone habit. I’m now getting better at consistently doing my laundry and packing my lunch.
3. I don’t know how to listen to God (or anyone else)
I use the Jesuit Pray as You Go podcast to help me practice Lectio Divina because I wasn’t sure I’d actually be able to read right after I wake up. However, I quickly find my mind wandering or occasionally drifting back to sleep.
It’s no easier in the gym. Crossfit is all about technique, so you have to pay attention to what the coach says.
I want to become the kind of person who naturally listens to the Holy Spirit and the reading of God’s word.
This process is reminding me just how much work listening requires.
Just acknowledging that listening doesn’t come naturally has already helped. When listening to Lectio (or the coach at the gym), I try to remain aware of my own attention. When my mind wanders, I gently remind myself about the task at hand.
4. Don’t expect to like it.
It should be said that I am not a natural morning person. Nor an athlete. Nor a good listener.
At first, what we value and what we like don’t lineup. Why would they? How could we possibly like something we’re unaccustomed to?
To develop discipline we need “carrots and sticks” that are more immediately powerful than our likes and dislikes. For me, this is the financial investment at the gym (stick) and the social opportunities of working out in class (a carrot for extroverts).
5. Be nice to yourself.
In The Willpower Instinct, Kelly McGonigal makes the point that when developing willpower, we should be nice to ourselves. Since we are doing something new, we are essentially a “child” in that area of our life. Instead of beating ourselves up for not doing well, we should sooth the child.
When I wake up too late for the gym and miss Lectio, my natural reaction is to beat myself up. These days, I’m trying to talk a little nicer to myself. I’ll say something like “That wasn’t the right thing to do. But it’s okay. You’re new at this, and you are getting better every day!”
I’m still not sure where this experiment will lead. I may or may not stick with either of these two practices. But I know that I’m capable of developing discipline.
So are you.
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